While a number of things that’ve come out of COVID and RIOTING do nothing but peeve me, there have been a few entries into the pro-column. If anyone cares to know what those entries are, do tweet me @Courtneyscoffs and let me know. Perhaps I’ll expound upon it another time. For now, one such thing which tickles my funny bone is the genre of Rioter vs. Car. I make no apologies for being delighted by this video series, even though the outcome is as predictable as a Mission Impossible movie. Spoiler alert: Tom Cruise wins. Recently, rioters attacked a police SUV in the festering caca pile known as Detroit. At which point the police SUV was done taking it. It did the lickety-split out of there but not before catapulting a few Protesters of Peace into the wild blue yonder.
You’re welcome, America.
According to the eggs on Twitter, the Peaceful Protesters of Peace had peacefully glitterized the back window. As one does. That’s why the driver said nuts to this and made my entire day by turning several peaceful protesters into falling dominos.
Let this video, and many others before it (I’ll link them below, because Christmas shouldn’t come but once a year), that motor vehicles aren’t to be trifled with. Actually, let me rephrase. If you’re threatening someone inside a motor vehicle, understand you might be transformed into a meaty pancake. To applause.
Pro-tip to people who find themselves faced with a wall of Peacefully Protesting Peaceniks throwing rocks, swinging bats, or misusing the word “literally”: the gas pedal is on the right. Punch it, my babies.